Gossip

Each year, like most people, I try to make some kind of New Year's resolution. This year I watched The Biggest Loser for the first time and realized just how important physical health was and decided that I wanted to get serious about taking care of myself and eating right. Having a baby makes you realize how much you want the best for them and it all starts with you! While I've been proud of myself for doing what I can to stay fit, my husband and I couldn't help but think that we wanted to make a more meaningful change. Gossip is such a huge part of life for a middle schooler or high schooler. But why? I guess that's where our society has led us...to believing that talking about each other, starting rumors, or making judgmental comments is natural, and adults are always saying "kids will be kids." A short while ago we were leaving someone's house and I realized that gossip isn't something that stays in high school. It follows us around for a while, and for some, it's something that we never grow out of. It seems like today, more than ever, adults aren't setting an example anymore. I say unacceptable! This isn't what Christ wants for us! Now, I can admit that, especially in the past, I have let gossip be a big part of my life. I've been burned by it, and I've also hurt others. In some ways, the hurt I've experience through gossip will never leave my heart because of how deep it scars. I didn't think I was a part of it anymore until I realized that letting others gossip around me, or not stopping it from happening is just as bad. Why do we do this? What is the point in all this petty, hurtful talk, and why do we let it take up so much of our time? In my opinion; jealousy....low self esteem...hatred...and boredom. For me and my family, this is going to be no more. We are going to soak ourselves in God's word, we are going to not let ourselves forget what our worth is, and what God's desire is for us and how we speak TO and ABOUT others. God says; "A GENTLE ANSWER TURNS AWAY WRATH, BUT A HARSH WORD STIRS UP ANGER" (Proverbs 15) If we have a problem with someone, instead of gossiping about it why not talk to the person themselves to solve the problem? When we are faced with conflict, instead of waiting to tear someone down behind their back, why don't we solve the issue peacefully and maturely like God intended for us to do. A good friend of mine once said; "it's hard to hate someone that you pray for." Which is something that I've always held dear to my heart. Praying for someone that you have negative feelings for really gives you clarity on what your issue really is with them, or if there really is an issue at all. It's true though, I've tried this...I have prayed long and hard for people that I have conflict with in life and even if they never stop the way they treat me, it is really hard to have negative feelings toward them! Another thing to consider is how gossiping reflects on you while you're doing it. Listening to someone gossip is not an attractive quality. And chances are, if you're anything like me, you'll learn that you can't trust people who gossip because if they're talking to you about someone else then they're also probably gossiping about YOU to someone else! Low self esteem, almost everyone deals with this at one time or another. It's such a natural part of life, but it doesn't have to be. I am constantly reminding myself that God is saying; "Do you know your wealth? It's more than diamonds hiding on a shelf! Do you know who you are? I've made you a shining star!" Wait, What? I'M worth MORE than DIAMONDS?? Yes, because God says so. If you can be strong in what God says about you and how amazing you are, then you are so much less likely to feel the need to tear others down to feel better about yourself. It really hurts my heart to think about all the people who are hurt by gossip. A cruel word can cut someone deeper than a knife. Seriously. I love the quote that says: "you may not remember what someone SAID or DID, but you'll always remember the way they made you FEEL." Gossip will always find it's way to the person it's about. And when it does, one person will be very hurt, and one person will be very ashamed. I found a quote online a while ago that my family is adopting as our new family motto and I hope that it strikes a chord in you and inspires you to not gossip, or let gossip happen around you: "ONLY LET LEAVE YOUR MOUTH WHAT IS HELPFUL IN BUILDING OTHERS UP!" Next time you think about gossiping or letting gossip happen around you consider these things: Is what I'm about to say going to hurt someone? How is what I'm about to say going to reflect on the kind of person I am? Have I tried praying for this person or situation? Would I be ashamed if this person found out I said this? What is something positive about this person or situation? Dear Lord, I pray that for everyone that reads this, and even for those who don't, that You makes us all less. All we need Lord is less of ourselves, and more of You. Empty us so we can be filled with Your love, and only the thoughts that You desire.